by Nick Gisburne
I’m certain that this plan will make me rich
There’s nothing here I cannot understand
I’ve heard that catching fairies needs a witch
But in the 1930s that was banned
The traps, so very simple and unique
Are baited with a pair of screaming kids
The blueprints mention how to make them shriek
Just bash their little heads with saucepan lids
The fairy folk will flap here in a fit
Addicted, like a duckling to a quack
And then I’ll use the mallet, just a bit
And bag the little buggers in a sack
Well, sadly, this was not the perfect day
The fairies ate the kids and got away
