by Nick Gisburne
What a wonderful day for a ride
In the coffin of someone who died
There is plenty of room
In the back of the tomb
If the lavender lube is applied
They are watching us, tucked in the trees
And I think they can smell the disease
I’m a little unsure
When we pay for the cure
Should we whistle, or offer the cheese?
On a fascist, dystopian planet
Stands a statue of Hitler in granite
It’s enormous in size
What a Nazi surprise
But their leader refuses to ban it
There are skeletons under the tree
You must feed them with poisonous tea
If the potion runs dry
You will certainly die
For their leader is merciless - me
He had stolen her magical skin
But it summoned her, hidden within
As her soul was set free
He was nailed to a tree
And he wept as she butchered his kin
She had nothing but rage and a gun
And she told him to get up and run
When he fell and he bled
He was already dead
But she screamed, “Are we now having fun?”
We are proud of our studious daughter
She absorbed all the lessons we taught her
Stealing treasure in sacks
Slicing skulls with an axe
Her degree is in pillage and slaughter
I was trying to polish my dragon
Round the back of the medicine wagon
When the doctor walked in
He said, “Don’t use the bin!
Here’s a sterile emergency flagon”
When I dream, I see visions of you
They are moments so precious, so few
But you’re frying a cat
In a whirlpool of fat
While an octopus paints a canoe
As I strap the device to my head
And the coils of the vortex burn red
I have summoned a gate
To a power so great
It will shatter the sunrise with dread
