by Nick Gisburne
The scientific splitting of the cheese
Is mastered with a method all her own
Precariously balanced on the knees
She monitors the dairy danger zone
Convinced essential science must be done
To stifle any murmuring of doubt
She knows that when the wheels of cheese have spun
Her critics will be doggedly devout
An alcoholic solvent, sipped with care
Accelerates the motion of the hand
Too quick and she will tumble from the chair
Too slow, the slice may not proceed as planned
Success! But no, the cheese was never split
The sample disappeared - she swallowed it
